Why I got Hepatitis C this weekend.

So, this past Friday was a busy day for me, which resulted in me getting Hepatits C.

I got up early to bus/metro in to the automaker's bail-out plea in front of Congress (yeah, I was on C-SPAN, no big deal) and kind of loved being there. Tons of energy, intense, and I was glad to see the automakers getting their As handed to them.

From there, I went to the Library of Congress where a little perverted man started the awkward of my life by saying, "come back next Friday around 11:30 and I will take you to lunch, then get you some wine to see how soft you really are." I still am not quite sure what that means, but all I could do was say, "not that soft" as I walked away.

The day continued with a trip to the new $650 million dollar Capital Visitor's Center, a Christmas concert at the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, and then off to a crazy night in Adam's Morgan. All of which I need to write more on and put up more pictures.



Anyways, crazy busy day, no time to go back home to get my car to leave at the Metro stop. So, I had to take a taxi.



By the time I get back to my metro stop it is 2:30am and freezing cold outside. I start looking for a taxi and panic as I see this drunk guy hopping into the back seat. Not knowing was else to do, I run the taxi down and asks if he can take two. Bad idea because that forces me in the front seat with the driver.

The guy in the back is wasted, the taxi driver asks him 3 or 4 times where he lives and he responds by saying not far from another street. Naturally that does nothing for the driver and he finally yells it out of him.

So here I am, not talking, dead tired in the car with a seemingly normal taxi driver and a drunk as H guy.

Me being the person I am, and always needing to do something, see a stack of movies sitting beside me in the front seat of the car, like they are touching my legs. I casually say, what movies you got here, and start just innocently shuffling through them. The cabby says nothing and I imagine its fine. The first two are normal and then BAM...PORNOS.

So here I am, not talking, dead tired in the car with a obsessed porno taxi driver who evidently can't wait till he gets home because he has DVD player in the car and a drunk as H guy at 3 AM.

Definately, uncomfortably. I did make it home safe, but thinking the whole time how disgusting the cab I paid to sit in is. I threw up in my mouth a lot about it.

I hate pornography, I think it encourgaes sexual abuse and disrespect for women.

Seventh Day

So, Sunday being the seventh day, I have totally pushed week 2. But here it is.

I resent my friend Tiff who sent me this email.

Your dissapoint me with your blog. I am ashamed to call you friend.

Tiff


Really, ASHAMED, thats mean. Real mean. And I was going to write about how thankful I was to have you for a friend. Guess, that won't happen.

Until, I get back from Rocky Gap, where internet is so slow, this will suffice. Pathetic I know.

Blogathy...

n. when the readership of your blog plummets due to your inability to post or in your over zealous behavior to post about everything in entirely too much detail.

I suffer from the first of the two spectrum's.




After being reprimanded, I have decided to make a Blogger comeback. Hold the cheers... it has stipulations. If I do not start updating my blog at least weekly for the next two months, I am going to kill "Randomness is bliss." Cut the cord, shiv it, drown it, basically straight up blog murder it. By January 2009 my blog will either be amazing or over.

There you go, blogathetic readers, help me, help you, know about my life. Any encouragement, threats, or writing posts for me would help.

xoOXXooXoXoOOX

Random what?

I hand sculpted these sausage patties for Valentines' Day for my family. Its pure skill.



If you look closely, you can see "I love you" burned onto the mountain. When I find me a man like this, believe me, I am hanging on.




This is the view from my front porch. Seriously, we live in one of the most beautiful places on earth.



Its a homemade chastity belt. You could even say redneck.



The McCain-Obama election is really heating up. Yet, there is an even bigger election going on in Southwest VA and Eastern Kentucky. For some reason, I thought this already happened. Maybe I am wrong?

Bad Blogger Bitten by Crab

So, my blog has been seriously neglected. I mean look at my background, its screaming for change. The background is staying, but here is a quick 2 month play by play of my life.

- Last week, I was at the magical Outer Banks, or if you are cool OBX, with my entire immediate family. Lets just say my family is amazing and I love them more than fish love water.

- While there, I got bit by a crab. Like the ones from the ocean. My dad told me it wouldn't bite, of course I listened, and the next thing I know I was screaming, laughing and yes, bleeding.

- I chased two shirtless teen boys down the beach. Together they were maybe 30. Some say that is wrong but I say, in the words of beloved J-lo - "My appetite for loving is now my hunger pain." And I am a Cougar and thats what Cougars do.

- My knees are suffering a slow, painful death. Mostly because I am training for my first marathon in October with my dear friend Tiffany Winder. I am totally pumped!

- Next year, I am trying out for American Idol. I can't sing, but its settled.

- This seriously needs a better update, but I hit a deer with my beloved Chevy Cavalier. I wept, the Hell's Angels who stopped, comforted me, and Josh Dalton, rescued me. It was totalled and totally depressing. Now, I am debating between buying an old '92 Chrysler LeBaron convertible, Dodge Nitro, Volvo, or a scooter. Thoughts?

- Since then, I have almost hit 3 more deer. They are out to get me. I think its because I sleep in my brother Jared's room (his mattress is better, so I moved). Anyways, there are deer heads everywhere in there, and I think they are angry they are dead and sending rageful little deer on terror missions. I even had nightmares about them. Its getting out of hand.

- I am officially 24. I am way wise.

- My family killed a groundhog a few weeks ago and skinned it. Fortunately no one ever ate it, but almost.

- I tried octopus. Its chewy and gross.

- I went to Dollywood. Its like redneck Disney Land and equally as fun. Plus, you get to see things there that you rarely see at a Disney park - a 90yr old woman smoking a pipe, tattoos of Lassie on men's hairy arms, etc.

- I am still working for the company in D.C. and Clinch Valley Printing. Also, I am volunteering for the Bland County Fair.

Yeah, thats kind of it. I will add pictures, it could be later today, tomorrow, or next month.

Forever Mother's Day Gifts

You know, Mother's Day is rapidly approaching, and when I say rapidly, I mean less than 12 hours. So, me being the procrasinator I am, thought I will just pick my mom something when I am out today and that idea was pure brilliance. Had I not waited, I would have missed a real bargain.



The Green Hills cemetary lots are exceptional. Not only are they nestled in the beautiful Appalachian Mountains but they come with complementary glow in the dark crosses that illuminate the night , a gargantuan version of the 23rd Pslam, and right across the street from the local bar. Its a beautiful site to behold and this Mother's Day, I know that I will be taking home something my mom can keep forever.

Gonna Kill Somebody

My nephew is seriously one of the cutest kids and full of flair. Very perceptive and smart for being 3.

My dad had his first of the month antique auction on Saturday and with a huge assortment of guns, it brought in quite the crowd. Spring brings more than flowers here - men start wearing wife beaters, chest/upper arm hair everywhere, and others forget that those button-up shirts actually button up, so lets just say skin is everywhere here especially at a gun and knife auction.

Well, my nephew was at the auction checking out his options for adulthood and coloring beside my mom as she checked people in. This guy walks in wearing a cowboy hat, he is lean, with his button-up open to expose his chest, and just looks terrifying. Like just plain angry. Little David starts staring at him when he walks in and is just trying to figure him out. When the guy finally signs in and walks out, he leans close and whispers to my mom, "Grandma, I think that man is going to kill someone." Probably one of the funniest things ever. I mean, its kind of sad, but you know you must be creepy if even a 3 year old gets the vibe.

Anyways....good news...I have a new dating post, its incredible. Should be coming soon.